6. GOOD CONDUCT

Islam deals with man’s relationship with Allah which is called ‘ibadah (worship) and his relationship with his fellow creatures which is called mu‘āmalah (behaviour towards others) or akhlāq (good conduct). These two kinds of relationship have to go hand-in-hand in proper balance and proportion. Ignoring any one of them is wrong. It is not right to say that as long as I am good with others I do not have to observe prayers and fasting. It is also wrong to say that as long as I do my prayers I should not care for others. A tradition dealing with mu‘āmalah is as follows:
عَنْ عَائِشَةَ أَنَّ رَجُلًا قَعَدَ بَيْنَ يَدَيْ النَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ
فَقَالَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ إِنَّ لِي مَمْلُوكِينَ يُكَذِّبُونَنِي وَيَخُونُونَنِي وَيَعْصُونَنِي
وَأَشْتُمُهُمْ وَأَضْرِبُهُمْ فَكَيْفَ أَنَا مِنْهُمْ قَالَ يُحْسَبُ مَا خَانُوكَ وَعَصَوْكَ وَكَذَّبُوكَ
وَعِقَابُكَ إِيَّاهُمْ فَإِنْ كَانَ عِقَابُكَ إِيَّاهُمْ بِقَدْرِ ذُنُوبِهِمْ كَانَ كَفَافًا لَا لَكَ وَلَا عَلَيْكَ وَإِنْ
كَانَ عِقَابُكَ إِيَّاهُمْ دُونَ ذُنُوبِهِمْ كَانَ فَضْلًا لَكَ وَإِنْ كَانَ عِقَابُكَ إِيَّاهُمْ فَوْقَ ذُنُوبِهِمْ
اقْتُصَّ لَهُمْ مِنْكَ الْفَضْلُ قَالَ فَتَنَحَّى الرَّجُلُ فَجَعَلَ يَبْكِي وَيَهْتِفُ فَقَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ
صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ أَمَا تَقْرَأُ كِتَابَ اللَّهِ { وَنَضَعُ الْمَوَازِينَ الْقِسْطَ لِيَوْمِ الْقِيَامَةِ
فَلَا تُظْلَمُ نَفْسٌ شَيْئًا وَإِنْ كَانَ مِثْقَالَ حَبَّةٍ مِنْ خَرْدَلٍ أَتَيْنَا بِهَا وَكَفَى بِنَا
حَاسِبِينَ } الْآيَةَ فَقَالَ الرَّجُلُ وَاللَّهِ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ مَا أَجِدُ لِي وَلِهَؤُلَاءِ
شَيْئًا خَيْرًا مِنْ مُفَارَقَتِهِمْ أُشْهِدُكُمْ أَنَّهُمْ أَحْرَارٌ كُلُّهُمْ.
(رواه أحمد و الترمذي).
“It was narrated by ‘Ā’ishah (may Allah
be pleased with her) that a man said to the Prophet:
‘O Messenger of Allah, I have slaves who belie me, betray me
and disobey me. So I beat them and insult them. What will happen
between me and them?’ The Messenger of Allah (p.b.u.h.) said to him:
‘Their belying, betrayal and disobedience to you will be compared with
your punishment against them. If your punishment is below their bad deeds
to you, it will be merit for you. If your punishment is equal to their bad deeds
to you, then there will be neither merit nor sin. But if your punishment is
beyond their bad deeds to you, the merit you have before will be cut from
you.’ On hearingthis, the man started weeping and crying. The Messenger
of Allah said:‘Haven’t you read the Book of Allah which said, “We [i.e.,
Allah] shall set up scales of justice for the day of Judgement, so that
not a soul will be dealt with unjustly in the least. And if there be
(no more than) the weight of a mustard seed, We will bring it (to
account): and enough are We to take account.”’ [Qur’ān, al-
Anbiyā’ [21]:47). The man said: ‘O the Messenger of Allah,
I don’t find anything better than to be separated from
these people. I bear witness that they are free’” 17
The man freed his slaves, got rid of them, for fear of committing sin in abusing them.
So, if you yell at your Muslim brother or sister, if you assault, abuse and humiliate him or her and he or she does not fight back, do not think this person is coward, stupid weak, and worthless. He or she might be a smart one, collecting merits from you. If you want to be smarter, ask forgiveness from him or her, and do not repeat the same mistake. If somebody wrongs you, cheats you, try hard to get back your right. But if you cannot get it back for any reason, because the person disappears, for example, do not be upset and lose hope. You will get it back in the Hereafter. The cheater will realize that he is cheating himself unknowingly.
In this world people wrong each other, cheat each other suck each other’s blood, become “wolves to each other”. People could be worse than wolves. The wolves themselves are not wolves to each other; they are gentle to each other, they work and hunt together in a pack; they are even one of the most faithful animal species to their mates.
In the Hereafter none will be wronged. This is Allah’s promise. He said:
وَاتَّقُوا يَوْمًا تُرْجَعُونَ فِيهِ إِلَى اللَّهِ ثُمَّ تُوَفَّى كُلُّ نَفْسٍ مَا كَسَبَتْ وَهُمْ لَا يُظْلَمُونَ
(البقرة : ‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‌‌‌‌‌‌‍‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‍‍‍٢٨١‍‍‍)
“And fear the day when ye shall be brought back
to Allah. Then shall every soul be paid what it earned,
and none shall be dealt with unjustly.” 18
Allah also said:
وَمَنْ يَغْلُلْ يَأْتِ بِمَا غَلَّ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ ثُمَّ تُوَفَّى
كُلُّ نَفْسٍ مَا كَسَبَتْ وَهُمْ لَا يُظْلَمُونَ
(آل عمران : ١٦١)
“…. And if any person acts dishonestly,
he shall, on the day of Judgement, restore what he
misappropriated; then shall every soil receive
its due whatever it earned, and none
shall be dealt with unjustly.” 19
Everything, however small it is, will be brought and shown in the Hereafter. Allah said:
فَمَنْ يَعْمَلْ مِثْقَالَ ذَرَّةٍ خَيْرًا يَرَهُ. وَمَنْ يَعْمَلْ مِثْقَالَ ذَرَّةٍ شَرًّا يَرَهُ
(الزلزال : ٧-٨)
“Then shall anyone who has done an atom’s
weight of good, see it! And anyone who has done
an atom’s weight of evil, shall see it!” 20
In one tradition the Prophet said that the real bankrupt is the person who lost his merits and rewards as payment to the person he had wronged in this world. If he has no more merit left and still has to pay, he has to take the demerits of those whom he had wronged.
The Prophet was asked about the case of a woman who was pious, but used to hurt the feelings of her neighbours, and a woman who was not so pious, but did not hurt others' feelings,what would happen to them in the Hereafter. It was narrated byAbū Hurayrah that someone asked the Prophet:
إنَّ فُلَانَةَ تَصُوْمُ النَّهَاَر وَتَقُوْمُ اللَّيْلَ وَ تُؤْذِي جِيرَانَهَا بِلِسَانِهَا فَقَالَ:
لَا خَيْرَ فِيْهَا هِيَ فِي النَّار، قِيْلَ : فَإنَّ فُلَانَةَ تُصَلِّي اْلمَكْتُوْبَةَ وَتَصُوْمُ رَمَضَانَ وَتَتَصَدَّقُ
بِأَثْوَارٍ مِنْ أقِطٍ وَلَا تُؤْذِي أَحَدًا بِلِسَانِهَا قَالَ هِيَ فِي الْجَنَّةِ »
(رواه الحاكم و أحمد و البيهقي)
"So-and-so used to do the (recommended) fasting in the day time
and (recommended) prayers at night but hurts her neighbours with
her tongue"; he (the Prophet) said, "There is no goodness with her,
she will go to Hell."; it was told to him, "So-and-so prayed the
obligatory prayers (only), fasted (only)in the month of Ramadan,
and used to give charity with her dried milk, but she did
not hurt anyone with her tongue"; he said,
"She will go to Heaven." 21
»
In another tradition the Prophet warned us against mistreating our neighbours. Abū Hurayrah narrated that the Prophet said:
وَاللَّهِ لَا يُؤْمِنُ وَاللَّهِ لَا يُؤْمِنُ وَاللَّهِ لَا يُؤْمِنُ قَالَهَا
ثَلَاثَ مَرَّاتٍ قَالُوا وَمَا ذَاكَ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ قَالَ الْجَارُ لَا يَأْمَنُ
الْجَارُ بَوَائِقَهُ قَالُوا وَمَا بَوَائِقُهُ قَالَ شَرُّهُ
(رواه البخاري و أحمد)
“By Allah he does not believe [perfectly],
by Allah he does not believe [perfectly],by Allah he
does not believe [perfectly].” He said it three times. They
[i.e., his companions] asked, "O Messenger of Allah, who is that?”
He said: “The neighbour who does not make his neighbour
safe from his annoyance.” They asked, “What is his
annoyance?” He said, “His wrong-doings” 22

Footnotes:
17. Reported by Ah.mad and al-Tirmidhī
18. Qur’ān, al-Baqarah [2]:281
19. Qur’ān, Āl ‘Imrān [3]:161
20. Qur’ān, al-Zilzāl [99]:7-8
21. Reported by al-Hākim, Ahmad, and al-Bayhaqī
22. Reported by Bukhārī and Ahmad